January 31, 2008

Oh come on!

Did you know experts have long linked heart trouble to sports fans? I don't think anyone would be surprised to hear that fact. Let's see, what could be the cause? Perhaps consuming beer, chicken wings, potato chips, beer, chili cheese fries, little hot dogs wrapped in croissant and more beer while sitting on your ass instead of walking around out in the world has something to do with it. Nah, couldn't be all that stuff. Must be something else.

That's right, it's the stress of the game. Feeling that your team could lose can cause you so much distress your heart gives out. Call me cruel (go ahead), but if a dude is so wrapped up in sports that he can experience stress on a level that causes a grabber during the big game, that person kind of sucks. Now, if it's caused by all the beer guzzling and fried food-eating, that's fine. That's a real reason. Especially in Chicago.

January 30, 2008

Easy street

I was pretty excited two weeks ago when I got my interest check from my apartment security deposit escrow account. $2.48 richer, I went out and splurged. Let me tell you, the only thing that tastes better than a McDonald's cheeseburger and small fry is a free McDonald's cheeseburger and small fry. Just when I thought life couldn't get any better, I get this puppy in the mail:


This second check was accompanied by a letter telling me that due to a bank error the original check I received was for an incorrect amount and I was owed more money. And just like that I was nine cents richer. Sweet!

But how to spend my newfound wealth? I can give one cent to nine of the guys on the street asking for "just a penny" for the homeless. I can call my step-sister in Bonaire for 5 minutes on Skype. I can buy 4 two-cent rate change stamps and leave the last penny on the ground for someone to find for good luck. I can go back in time to 1970, borrow a penny from someone and buy a Hershey Bar.

Hmmmm, all of these sound good. How would you spend nine cents?

January 06, 2008

Yo

I'm still here. Just been a little busy/sick/full from work/winter/holidays. I'll be back soon with new tales of NYC. Until then, enjoy this picture of the women's restroom in a Macy's in the suburbs of Chicago.

Not the way to win hearts in a city that hates you, Macy's.